


standing in front of you

by asexualsartemis



Category: Glee
Genre: Apologies, Canon Compliant, Communication, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Reality TV, Reunions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-04
Updated: 2019-10-04
Packaged: 2020-11-23 06:08:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20887370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asexualsartemis/pseuds/asexualsartemis
Summary: A chance meeting on Blaine's show Songland has Marley facing old hurts.





	standing in front of you

**Author's Note:**

> The song Jake sings is Back to December by Taylor Swift.

Marley crossed her legs, waiting for the next songwriter to arrive in the Songland room. She had her fellow former-Glee member Blaine Anderson to her left and Ryan Tedder to her right. The artist the song writers were pitching to was Shawn Mendes, whom Marley was low-key fangirling over.

_Thank you, Blaine_, she thought as she smiled to herself. Songland was his baby, and he had personally invited her to the panel. Marley all but yelled her agreement into the phone, readying to help her fellow songwriters catch a break. She knew first-hand how hard it was to get your song out there in the industry. Working alongside Blaine, Ryan freaking Tedder, and artists such as Shawn was a bonus.

Scanning the lyrics to the next song, Marley couldn't wait to hear the melody that accompanied them. The lyrics hit you in the gut and were right up Shawn's alley, but Marley knew a melody could make or break a strong lyric.

Soft footsteps on the floor alerted Marley of the next songwriter's entrance. She quickly adjusted her dress (She would be on television!) to lay flat before focusing her attention on the new arrival.

The sight of familiar brown eyes took her breath away. Her gut fluttered and dropped all at once, and she hoped her expression was not an open book for the future audience to see.

Marley could feel Blaine's gaze burning into her face, questioning. Her own gaze slid over to him quickly and gave him an imperceptible nod. She was… not fine with this, but she'd power through like the professional she was. So what if Jake, her first love that had cheated on her in high school, stood before her now. She could look past that. Jake was a good writer, and from Blaine's barely contained look of surprise, he was just as floored as she was. She could do this.

Do this for Shawn.

Do this for _Jake_.

Even though he shattered her heart years ago, his work deserved to be heard. She could champion that.

That was why she signed up for the show in the first place, was it not?

Ryan, an outsider to the weird tension that descended upon the room, cleared his throat. Thankfully, Shawn was too busy reading the lyrics sheet each one of them had to notice. Ryan asked Jake what his name was and what brought him here.

"My name is Jacob Puckerman," he began. His eyes lingered on Marley and then Blaine before connecting back on Ryan. Marley noted the sorrowful look to his brown eyes. "I've tried the singer gig before, but it wasn't my thing. Decided that I still had stuff to say, even if I wasn't the one to deliver them." 

He then, like a switch, turned on his charm and giddiness as he looked at Shawn. "I'm so stoked for the opportunity to present this song to you, dude. You're a genius in the lyrics department." That earned a chuckle out of Shawn, his dimples on display.

"Then take it away, man. On paper it seems pretty solid."

Unbidden a wave of nervousness crashed over her as Jake stepped up to the microphone stand. He sat on the provided stool. As he took an intake of breath, Marley herself forgot how to breathe.

Suddenly she found herself in the Glee room again. Jake's green shirt morphed into a blue and black striped sweater. But instead of him singing about letting someone love you, he was singing—

_ "So this is me swallowing my pride / Standing  _ _ in front of you saying I'm / Sorry for that night / And I go back to December all the time." _

— about them. About him. About being sorry and wanting to make it right. About _missing her_.

A tear fell down Marley's face.

She should stop this. _Blaine_ should stop this! It was his show, after all. He _knew_ what had happened between them. 

Marley was shattering all over again. This time in front of multiple artists she admired and a television crew. It had been 15 years. She had gotten over this, hadn't she?

But there was Jake, right in front of her, singing his damn heart out, dredging everything back up and ripping open that wound she tried so hard to heal.

But she was also spellbound by him. His voice had only grown richer since the last she heard it at Unique and Ryder's wedding as they sang drunken karaoke as all freshly 21 year olds. Furthermore, she could not deny how powerful the lyricswere. 

_ "—But if we loved again I swear I'd love you right / I'd go back in time and change it but I can't / So if the chain is on your door, I understand." _

The last note rang out in the room and silence followed. 

Ryan exclaimed, "Whoosh, that was… an emotional onslaught!" 

Blaine, always a performer, took that moment to laugh. He nodded his head over at Marley, a sweet smile gracing his lips. "You made Miss Emotional Hurricane herself cry." He reached out and gave her hand a squeeze, but Marley could see through the act. A swirl of apology and concern swam in his eyes as he locked eyes with Marley. She gave him a small, thankful smile.

"I mean… he really left his heart at our feet in this song, that's for sure!" Marley, too, was a good performer. She turned a wide smile on Jake but found him avoiding eye contact.

"Right!" Shawn interjected excitedly, taking the attention from her. As he, Ryan, and Blaine played wordsmith and producer, explaining where the words were a bit clunky and that the record really called for a stripped back melody—whether acoustic or just piano remained to be seen—Marley tried to get a handle on her emotions. She stayed quiet, nodding along to their suggestions. She agreed, the instrumental element was lacking the emotional levity the lyrics required.

But that wasn't _her_ problem. There was no way she'd have to work on this record. Blaine would never do that to her.

She could push this song out of her mind and once it was out in the world she'd have the control to turn the station if Shawn's voice was not enough to separate her from it.

She wished Jake the best. But it was 15 years too damn late to change things.

* * *

Jake was going to strangle Blaine.

Not only was he blind-sided by Marley, he had no damn idea this was all Blaine's brain child. On top of that, as fate would have it, he and Marley were paired to work on the song he wrote specifically about her—_for her_, really—to her, but now he had to work _with_ her to make the song about him baring his soul and being sorry for the pain he inflicted on her better for another artist.

Someone really hated him.

"You _have_ to switch me," he demanded, standing in the tiny kitchenette of Blaine's trailer. His finger absently drifted across the wood of the photo of the happy Hummel-Anderson clan.

"My hands are tied," Blaine insisted, pulling a comb through his gelled hair. At least some things never changed.

"It's your show. _You're_ the boss!" Jake crossed his arms over his chest in exasperation. "You make the rules."

"Sure, you're right. It _is_ my show." Blaine finally turned his full focus on Jake. "But my reasoning still stands. Marley's talents are best suited for the work that needs—"

"Bull-fucking-shit, B."

Blaine sighed. "Look, I know how hard this is. _Trust_ me." He rested his hand on Jake's shoulder. "You and Marley need to put your emotions aside and work on this for Shawn. And between you and me," Blaine dropped his voice to a conspiratorial whisper, "you and Marley work your magic and—boom shakalaka—you got this in the bag."

Jake narrowed his eyes at the shorter man. "What did my brother ever see in you?"

Blaine's laughter echoed in the trailer's small space as he walked away.

* * *

"Blaine is the devil in a bow tie."

Jake snorted from his spot on the tiny couch in the small but state of the art recording studio. "Can't argue with that." He strummed an angry note on the acoustic guitar in his lap.

He moved over to give Marley more room on the couch to sit. He caught himself staring at her beautiful legs and forced himself to look away lest he make this even worse than it already was.

An awkward silence fell between them.

"Ok, so… anything to say before we're stuck in this room with cameras?" Jake asked. His heart was already pounding in his chest from just her mere presence, how the hell was he going to get through this?

He could not help but notice that the blue dress she was wearing brought out the different shades of blue in her eyes. He went back to the safety of staring at his guitar. He could not risk drowning in their beauty again. He had lost that right the moment he had called Bree that damned night. He also was a coward, knowing that the rightful anger and hurt that was bound to rage in her eyes would break him.

She was never supposed to hear this song. Or if she did, he reasoned, at least it'd be through the mouthpiece of another artist and not blatantly obvious it was his words.

He was a coward. Had been for years. It was not as if the opportunity never arose to apologize to her. They were thrust together at every event that a Glee member would throw. There were weddings, graduations, promotions, birthdays, a few premature funerals. But no, he respectfully kept his distance. He did not have the right of crashing back in her life, ripping open a deep wound all for the sake of his own feelings.

But here they were.

"Your song was… pretty. Powerful." She chose her words carefully. "I-I thank you for them, just…. I don't want you to think this changes anyt—"

Jake sat up quickly. "Oh, no. That was never—the song wasn't for you. No. I-I mean, okay, I guess it was—maybe? At first? But now… I needed it, to heal." Jake was fumbling his words and he hated that this was happening like this. Happening at all.

"Look. Trust—heh, _wrong_ word. I had no fucking clue you'd be here. Or that this was Blaine's thing. I just felt that this song was wasted potential, and the dance studio is hurting so I thought royalties would… you know, help me stay open."

Oh, there it was out in the open. Jacob Ian Puckerman's dream was dying. He could not stop the word vomit even if he tried at this point. The only person he had told was his mother; not even Ryder or his brother knew. He told Marley about the rehab, the inevitable alcoholism courtesy of his father's genes and the drug-induced missing year. How his mother cashed in part of her retirement fund to help him get the best doctors and therapy.

"It was _not_ because I lost you," Jake emphasized. He didn't want Marley to feel guilty about his downward spiral. He was not lying either. True, was it a catalyst? Possibly. But truthfully he lost control of his life. He could not see the magic in the world anymore.

Marley was far from the first person he'd cheated on. Sex became a self-sabotage tactic. He ruined good things before they could ruin him. Losing his studio, well… that was his rock bottom.

"Sobriety stuck. I… was able to talk to my dad before he died, which helped too. But I guess, in a way… it's good I'm here. Twelve steps, forgiveness and all that shit, you know?" He gave a tiny laugh.

Marley's eyes were swimming with tears when he chanced a glance at her. This, too, was what he cowered away from for so long. The tears, the hurt not at him but _for_ him, and the _pity._ The thing he loved most about Marley Rose was her heart and how she cared for other people.

"Marls… please, _don't._ I hurt _you._ I don't deserve your pi—"

"It's not pity, you buffoon." He longed to wrap her in his arms and sooth her tears away. "Yes, you hurt me. In _high school._ I should've—" She sniffed. Her hand smudged her mascara as she hastily brushed her tears away, not giving a damn if make-up had to redo it before the cameras rolled.

She was right. It wasn't pity. It was _guilt._

_Damn your bleeding heart, Marls_.

"You didn't know."

"That's the _point,_ Jake. I let a mistake fester. We were _friends_ first. We—I could have, I don't know, woman'd up and helped you out."

"I _didn't_ and I still _don't_ deserve your friendship," Jake practically bellowed. He had not wanted things to get this far. Tears were flowing and a sea of emotions crackled between them. Marley was so shocked at his outburst her tears stopped. "Sorry—that was… harsher than I meant it."

Just then the door burst open. The hair and make-up team blocked Marley from his view for last touches. The sound guy turned his attention on Jake to wire his mic on and their conversation was forgotten as focus turned to making the best song they could for Shawn.

* * *

Marley was proud of herself for managing to act semi-normal while the songs were performed for Shawn. She and Jake had decided to strip the song back to the bare bones, allowing Shawn the opportunity to just jam on his acoustic guitar and let the soft melody carry the sorrow through the words. Everyone was spellbound after Jake's performance and Marley found it in herself to smile and mean it.

Unsurprisingly to her and Blaine (who had gushed at her over the direction they had taken with the song after Jake had left the room), Shawn Mendes picked Jake's song to cut.

The absolute shock on Jake's face had her itching to run and give him a hug in celebration. To kiss him on the cheek and tell him how proud she was.

But that wouldn't be best.

She needed to heal herself first, something she had not left herself do by burying the hurt deep inside her and forgetting about it.

The first step though, was forgiving Jake. He had been, essentially, a kid, after all. They were both struggling to figure out how to deal with their emotions. He deserved an apology from her as well, for the things she did in the aftermath.

It was not she who made the first move, though. It was Blaine. She still found it difficult to believe he truly had nothing to do with this.

"Why don't we all catch up? Old times' sake."

She, too, found it difficult to believe that Blaine just happened to have a family emergency the moment it was time to order dinner.

Leaving her alone. With Jake. Again.

After a pointed silence while each of them perused the menu, Jake said, "So."

"So," Marley repeated, flipping a page in her menu.

"Can you believe Shawn Mendes picked _my_ song?" he asked like that was not the reason they were there nor was he bursting with excitement on the inside.

"I knew he would," Marley answered nonchalantly.

They gave their waitress their orders and without the menus as a distraction they were left alone. Again.

Marley fiddled with her fork. She took a deep breath through her nose and out her mouth. _Here goes nothing_.

"Look, Jake, I—I forgive you. I accept your apology and I hope you accept mine in return."

Jake's brow furrowed. "Wait, why are _you_ apologizing? You're not the one that broke—"

"Shattered, actually," Marley interjected quietly. Jake's face fell. "But time heals all wounds. I think we've grown enough to know that we were stupid kids in love for the first time. Like Megara says."

" 'People do crazy things when they're in love'," Jake quoted with a chuckle. "Still, why—"

"Ryder," Marley said with a small shrug. She had hooked up with Ryder to try to hurt Jake as much as he had hurt her; dating his best friend.

"Oh, _that?_ Psh, whatever," he deflected.

"You didn't talk to him for _four months!"_

"And what I did caused us to not have a meaningful conversation for  _ fifteen _ years. All because I couldn't get laid when I wanted to." Jake rolled his eyes 

"Maybe I was right to peg you for an  _ oh oh womanizer, baby _ ," Marley sang. 

And just like that the tension lessened with a shared laugh.

"Yeah, what was up with _that?_ We had barely talked."

"It was all Unique."

"Well, I agree. You were right."

"Despite everything, I'm glad I ignored her." 

Their eyes locked and all the feelings came rushing back and Marley let them fill her up, the good and the bad.

"We had good times, didn't we?"

Marley grinned. "Yes." She took a sip of her drink. "You know, despite it all, I never stopped loving you." She had not planned to let that secret slip, but after his confessions in the studio he deserved brutal honesty from her.

"Jake, I—"

"Marls, hey," Jake interrupted. The warmth of his hand on her own made her want to wrap herself in it. "We don't have to… do this tonight. It's just nice… seeing you." He gave her a lopsided grin, reminding her of a little puppy. Her heart fluttered.

"No, Jake, just let me…. I need to say this. I think we should try to be friends again. I miss you terribly. And face it, Glee get togethers _suck_ when I feel like I can't even say hello." 

Jake huffed. "Tell me about it." A beat. "So, buddy—"

She scrunched up her face in disgust. "Oh god, _please_ no. 'Marls' is just fine. Don't ruin it." The two shared a smile.

"Alright, Marls. Friends?" Jake lifted up his hand for a handshake, and Marley already missed his warmth.

"No, you goober." She stood up from the table and motioned for him to join her. "Friends hug."

Jake made a fake put-upon sigh. "Fine." He reached for her but stopped and pointed at her face. "No funny business."

"You're terrible."

"You love me."

Yes, she most certainly did.

* * *

"You know, if it wasn't for me we wouldn't be here," Blaine said as he fixed his purple bow tie in the mirror.

"Oh shut up. It would have happened _without_ you." Ryder threw a pillow at Blaine causing a high-pitched squawk to erupt from the assault followed by a shrill, "My hair!"

"I was sure back then after Finn and Rach, it would have been y'all walking down the aisle. He was so pathetic on the phone asking me for dating advice. Maybe I should have told you to keep it in your pants, first hand experience," his brother interjected as he pinned Jake's boutonniere on him… well, tried. "Yo, bow tie, pin this shit on the boy."

"Yeah, yeah. I know I was a jackass and ruined everything. I still can't believe she even talks to me let alone said yes."

"Yeah, so don't blow it this time, yeah?" Ryder joked as he gave Jake's shoulder a punch.

"You know," Jake began, leveling a glare at Ryder. "I am regretting my decision of making _you_ my best man. Blaine's done your duties anyway."

"Recognition, thank you!" Blaine interjected.

"I mean, I was a fool to pick the rebound guy my fiancé picked to take my place."

"Hey, I said I was sorry. But you were the one to let her _go."_

"Ooh wait until I tell Unique who your true love is!"

"Hate to interrupt ... whatever _this_ is but it's showtime," Kurt announced complete with jazz hands.

Ryder clapped Jake on the shoulder and told him "see you out there." Blaine pulled him down into a big hug. Puck hung back.

"Any last words of wisdom?"

Puck laughed. "Don't let her go this time, alright?" He eyed his brother as Jake gave himself a last once over in the mirror. "How you really feeling?"

"Like I want to puke. Like I don't deserve this."

Puck pulled him into a tight hug. "Hey, Puckermans deserve happiness. Never forget that." Jake knew he was right. Puck had found that with Finn and still lost him. Jake had asked him once if he would do it all over again, when he knew it would end in tragedy. Puck, no hesitation, had said he would. Just to feel that love again, no matter how short-lived.

Jake's self sabotaging ways were over. He'd never let Marley go again.

His brother broke the hug. "Alright, chick flick moment over. Let's go get you hitched."

Moments later found Marley clutching Jake's hands as they recited their vows. Matching tears of happiness swam in their eyes.

It had been a long road, but it had led to Marley standing in front of him, agreeing to be his forever and he to be hers and he finally understood. He needed to be broken down to be built back up.

He finally felt he deserved this.


End file.
